


for want of my love

by enamuko



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Domestic Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:03:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,674
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21947023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enamuko/pseuds/enamuko
Summary: Ferdinand is wearing himself to the bone for the sake of the Empire, and Lorenz is hardly pleased with that.
Relationships: Ferdinand von Aegir & Edelgard von Hresvelg, Ferdinand von Aegir & Hubert von Vestra, Ferdinand von Aegir/Lorenz Hellman Gloucester
Comments: 4
Kudos: 48





	for want of my love

**Author's Note:**

  * For [middletails](https://archiveofourown.org/users/middletails/gifts).



> This was written for the FE3H Secret Santa! I hope you enjoy it, @middletails!

Ferdinand was well aware that he had been in worse pain in his life. Everyday aches and pains could hardly compare to falling off a horse after taking a spear to the chest, or feeling magic flames licking at your skin when you were a moment too slow to dodge the incoming spell of an enemy mage.

His back and shoulders seemed well-prepared to protest otherwise.

It was bad enough that he abandoned any attempt to keep himself ‘graceful’ and ‘poised’ as soon as he had gotten through the front door and was reasonably certain the only people who might catch a glimpse at him were a wayward servant or two. 

He opted instead to massage his aching muscles and allow his posture to droop just the slightest bit, if only to alleviate the pressure and tenseness that had built up over an entire morning spent hunched over a table, followed swiftly by an afternoon spent sitting at that same table in an uncomfortable seat arguing as politely as possible with a roundtable of the most stubborn nobles he had ever met (and at least in his own mind, he was _quite_ done with playing at politeness— it wasn’t as though anyone could hear him, as he was quite certain that even their most talented of mages had not figured out mind-reading yet, and as he was well-acquainted with who he considered to be the best mage in Adrestia, he would have heard about it by now), followed by an evening of more hunching and a lot of barely-aborted curses…

Well. All of it added up to a day that had been just as bad for his body as it had been for his patience, of which he liked to think he had a great deal.

Thankfully his lodgings at Enbarr were not far from the Imperial Palace. He had been offered a room for the night, as it was quite late and Edelgard and Hubert were (in their own ways, and rather touchingly) concerned about his going home alone at night and after such a long and tiring day, but he had politely refused.

All he wanted was to collapse into his own warm bed after a long, difficult day.

He all but dragged himself up the stairs, glad that the servants had left a few dim lamps burning so he could see in the darkness, and practically stumbled into his bedroom.

Normally he would have insisted on a bath before bed, and the hot water would have done wonders for his aching muscles, but he was too bone-achingly tired to pour a bath and was not entirely convinced he wouldn’t fall asleep and drown. Instead he quickly changed into the night clothes that had been left out for him and slid immediately into bed, abandoning even his nightly ritual of brushing out the knots in his hair before going to sleep.

The longer he held the position of Prime Minister, the more and more he was having to abandon _any_ sort of ritual above the bare minimum to keep himself alive. Of course, things were at a delicate stage, and that was to be expected— he simply hoped that he and the rest of Edelgard’s trusted vanguard would come out the other end unscathed, and soon.

Just as he was rolling over to try and melt into a deep sleep, the dark lump in the bed next to him shifted.

Ferdinand was drawn in like a magnet, pressing the full length of his body along his lover’s back, nuzzling into their neck. A gentle floral scent invaded his senses, and it was such an immediate comfort that it felt almost as warm and enveloping as the bath he had chosen to forego.

“Ferdinand…?”

“I’m sorry, my love; I did not mean to wake you.”

Lorenz’ voice was heavy, almost syrupy with sleep, which was fitting as it was the sweetest thing Ferdinand could have heard in that moment.

No, he had not intended to wake him, and he didn’t relish the fact that he had, particularly because of the late hour; but he was also grateful for the balm of his voice, his _presence_ , after a long and stressful day…

Lorenz made a warm humming noise in the back of his throat and squirmed in place, rolling over so that they were face to face rather than Ferdinand being pressed against his back. He had enjoyed spooning against him, of course, but he would hardly complain about the change in positioning, even if he could only see the faintest outline of Lorenz’ features in the darkness.

“This is a late night, even for you.” Lorenz’ hand came up under the sheets, locking the fingers of one hand together with Ferdinand’s while his other arm remained folded comfortably around his head. “Do I need to remind you of the important of a good night’s sleep?”

“I may have chosen the wrong career field for that,” he said, meaning to follow it up with a chuckle but instead following it with a jaw-cracking yawn, which he supposed was equally appropriate.

“Then perhaps I need to remind the _Emperor_ of its importance.”

Even though his eyes had begun to adjust to the darkness, Lorenz’ face was still more a suggestion of shapes than anything concrete. He did not need to see him to know he was frowning deeply with a furrowed brow, in a look that could generously be described as a stern scowl but which Ferdinand personally referred to as a pout— though only in his own mind where Lorenz was unable to hear him.

“You need not worry, my love,” Ferdinand said, chuckling at the same time, because if there was any person he could imagine waltzing into Edelgard’s chambers to give her a stern lecture on her employment standards, it was Lorenz.

Of course, because he was only half convinced Lorenz was actually joking and not about to show up the next day to do exactly that, he had to choose his words carefully.

“A period of adjustment is to be expected,” he said, then sighed. “Edelgard’s vision is rather.. _Grand_ in scale. And hardly the sort of thing that can expect to be brought about without a great deal of hard work. As her trusted advisor, and voice of reason, I can hardly avoid my share of the work.”

He had to assume Lorenz’ expression softened into something still displeased, but more concerned rather than vaguely annoyed on his behalf, just based on the small put-upon sigh he gave.

Of course, they had this conversation quite regularly, so perhaps Ferdinand was operating off his memory of the last almost identical conversation they’d had rather than what was happening in front of him that he could not see.

Ferdinand gave Lorenz’ hand a gentle squeeze where their fingers were laced together. They did not fit together quite perfectly, which might have been a shame were it not for the fact that it was their wedding bands that were getting in the way. A pair of simply gold bands, not nearly so ostentatious as the elaborate and meaningful hand-crafted engagement rings they had worn— tradition dictated that, as the legitimate heir of House Aegir, that his betrothed was meant to wear his family ring, and he was sure House Gloucester had a similar tradition, but that had gone out the window almost immediately.

For one, Ferdinand was not quite sure how much of House Aegir truly _remained_ after Edelgard’s restructuring. Oh, it existed in name, certainly. Their lands had been taken and redistributed, but there were prominent noble houses in Adrestia (Vestra being among them) who called _no_ lands their own, and Edelgard had not divested him of either his childhood home or his wealth, at least beyond what he was already willing to give.

It was simply that… The very _concept_ of nobility had changed drastically under Edelgard’s rule, and quite rapidly. Ferdinand was still figuring out where precisely he fit into this new world of hers. Being the Prime Minister helped, gave him a sense of purpose where he might have otherwise been left adrift, but it was… An adjustment.

For another, that tradition had hardly been thought up with a pair like them in mind. Two Crest-bearing male heirs to noble houses, shrugging off their ‘duties’ to their bloodlines and families so they might be together? The Ferdinand who had been entrenched in the ideals of nobility might have thought it sounded like a nice dream, but was utterly out of his reach. What sort of chaos would befall a house with no legitimate heir, particularly one of such high standing in the Empire, and bearing a Crest to boot?

The Lorenz of Garreg Mach would have likely considered it utterly unthinkable, and Ferdinand had it on authority that he had not even been aware of his own attraction to men at the time.

That they were here, now, in this place, was a miracle in its own right. One Ferdinand was determined not to take for granted.

“It is sweet of you to worry, though.” As he said it, he brought Lorenz’ knuckles up to his lips to press a kiss there. “It makes it easier, knowing I have you to come home to.”

“Your sweet talk won’t pacify me this time,” Lorenz said, though Ferdinand could see the faintest hint of what looked like a smile on his face, and his voice softened to such a feathery, gentle tone that Ferdinand had to listen carefully to hear him even in the absolute silence of their bedroom. “I understand how difficult an undertaking _uprooting an entire continent_ is going to be, but… Well, I suppose I can’t help but worry more about you than about the state of the mess Edelgard made for herself.”

“I… Would not let Hubert hear you say that,” he said with a frown, though he understood the sentiment.

He trusted Edelgard, though he still felt better being able to stand at her side and offer his own judgement. But that did not mean she had not made things more difficult for herself than they perhaps had to be, in the long term, in order to move things along as quickly as possible.

Still, he believed in her, and Hubert, and the Professor, and himself. And no true change would ever come about without great sacrifice and hardship.

He did not think that would do much to, as Lorenz put it, ‘pacify’ his husband, however.

What he _did_ know would help— and he felt almost guilty for employing such a tactic for such a reason, though it was nothing malicious— was tugging Lorenz in by their joined hands so that he might slot his head in under Lorenz’ chin, snuggling against his chest and pressing feather light kisses to his collarbone just above the dip in his nightshirt.

Lorenz shuddered at the gentle touch, at the chaste kisses and Ferdinand’s warm breath against his skin, and Ferdinand felt the comfort of his husband’s arms wrap around him to draw him in. He angled his head better to be able to tuck it into the crook of his neck instead, their legs tangling together beneath the sheets until they were utterly inextricable from one another.

“I have half a mind to keep you in bed all day,” Lorenz said, his tone once again taking on a tone of threat that did not match up with his actual words at all. “To ensure you catch up on the sleep you so sorely need.”

“I cannot say I am not tempted,” Ferdinand replied, though his words were broken up by an inconvenient yawn that did far more to fortify Lorenz’ point than he cared for.

It was not as though he did not see the point of Lorenz’ side of the argument. He understood all too well that he was working himself to the bone, and could only do so for so long before everything started crumbling around him. And he also knew that if he told Edelgard he required some time to recover, she would grant it.

He _also_ knew that Edelgard and Hubert and Byleth would not stop working themselves to the bone in his absence, and would have to work even harder than they already did to compensate for his absence. And two sides of him revolted at the idea; the competitive side that despised the idea of allowing Edelgard to surpass him simply by admitting defeat, although he had long since set aside their petty schoolyard rivalry, but also the side of him that railed against the idea of leaving his friends to suffer while he stood by and relaxed.

Chivalry and petty antagonism; two strangely common bedmates in his life, he had noticed.

“I cannot simply abandon my work to be done by others, no matter how difficult it may be,” he said with a sigh, and before Lorenz could launch into his next protest, Ferdinand launched the next stage of his unfair retaliation that he hoped would appease him enough to keep him from starting a Political Incident in the middle of the Imperial Palace. “But I promise you, my sweet Gloucester rose… The moment things begin to quiet down, you and I will take some time to ourselves, go somewhere quiet and restful, for as long as you wish… Just you and I.”

It was an easy promise for Ferdinand to make, because there were days when the thought of being able to do so was all that fuelled him. Oh, the thought of a brighter future for the people of Fodlan, free of the shackles of the old ways they had been burdened by, that was good too. But while Ferdinand considered himself a rather selfless individual on the whole, he was also of the opinion that everyone needed something a touch selfish to drive them— 

And for him, that was Lorenz.

“Mm. You promise, do you?” Lorenz’ voice dripped with sarcasm, but Ferdinand did not allow him the privilege of further chance to retort before his hands found Lorenz’ waist and almost effortlessly flipped them over so that rather than being face to face, Ferdinand was crouched over Lorenz.

Lorenz let out a small undignified squeak that would have made the expended effort worth it no matter how exhausted Ferdinand was, simply because it was such an adorable sound… But even more than that, he adored the intimacy of their bodies pressed against each other as he lowered himself to be lying on top of Lorenz, hands smoothing up his body to his ribs and back down to his hips, his lips busying themselves with slow, soft kisses to Lorenz’ jaw and neck.

He had intended to simply go right to sleep, to take in what few hours of rest he could, but the draw of his beloved was for more irresistible.

“I do,” Ferdinand said, with all the conviction he could muster. “We could go to Brigid, enjoy the warmer climes. Petra would welcome us with open arms.”

“I would be burned to a crisp within _minutes_ ,” Lorenz reminded him with a playful smack to his shoulder, even as he rolled into Ferdinand’s touch and lifted his chin to give him easier access to the parts of him he wanted to kiss. “It might be worth it to see your freckles come out, though.”

“We will go wherever you wish,” Ferdinand said, glad that the darkness hid the blush that crept across his face. He personally did not care much for his freckles, as he felt the most beautiful people had clear, blemish-free skin— like Lorenz’ perfectly smooth skin the colour of a fresh froth of cream, which turned such a beautiful shade of pink-red when he was embarrassed, or overwhelmed, or in the throes of pleasure, or even simply basking in the love and adoration Ferdinand was all too happy to shower him with—

(If Lorenz enjoyed them, however, he was hardly going to complain. Given that where once he had the luxury of going out of his way to ensure they stayed hidden, the war and then his work made it difficult to be concerned with such things and he could no longer ensure they were hidden or, preferably, non-existent…

For someone who had been so completely devoted to the ideals of nobility, to the point that Ferdinand had looked to him as an example with glittering eyes and boundless enthusiasm dedicated towards building their friendship and making him happy, which he only later realized was the first sign that the affection he felt for him had been something more than platonic.

They were married now, so. Obviously.)

“The only thing I _wish_ ,” Lorenz said, pointedly, though his stern voice wavered with the warmth and pleased noises as he basked in Ferdinand’s affections. “Is for you to get some well-deserved rest.”

Had he not been so exhausted, physically and otherwise, Ferdinand would have gladly seen exactly how many of those noises he could wring from him, and even more gladly taken them beyond the simple (albeit lovely) pleased hums and breathy sighs…

But Lorenz was correct, and Ferdinand sadly could not ignore the temptation of sleep. Lorenz hardly mentioned ‘rest’ and he had to pull away from his mission to kiss the entire length of Lorenz’ jaw and throat to cover his mouth and spare his husband the sight of a jaw-cracking yawn.

When he pulled back to do so, Lorenz took advantage of both that and the fact that he was much more well-rested— though Ferdinand knew he worked hard in his role as Count Gloucester and in managing the Aegir household while Ferdinand was attending to Prime Minister business, anyone who had gotten a wink of sleep in the past two days was more well rested than he was at the moment— to roll them over, reversing their positions so that Ferdinand was on his back with Lorenz leaning over him.

“Sleep,” Lorenz said, reaching up to almost playfully tap the end of his nose with his finger, but the tone of voice and the hard set of his eyes. Then, his expression softened and he said, “Perhaps the sight of you sleeping peacefully will sooth me enough to keep me from going on a warpath directly into the center of the Imperial Palace tomorrow.”

Ferdinand knew Lorenz was only saying something like that to manipulate him, and that the odds were in favour of it being a joke (though it was never a sure thing, where Lorenz was concerned), but between the possible threat and how heavy his eyes were feeling, how heavy his entire _body_ was feeling as he was dragged down into the throes of sleep, he could hardly argue…

The last thing he registered before falling completely into slumber’s grasp was the familiar yet still heart-fluttering feeling of Lorenz’ lips pressed to his forehead.

Lorenz, as it turned out (and as Ferdinand had been fearing), had not been joking.

And he had very much not been appeased by the sight of Ferdinand’s peacefully sleeping face.

Because when he awoke, not to the early morning sun as he usually did but to the sun high in the sky, practically overhead— the servants told him nervously that Lord Gloucester had left explicit instructions that he not be woken under any circumstances and had left for the Palace several hours ago.

Ferdinand had barely managed to get himself looking presentable before his overwhelming anxiety had driven him to the Imperial Palace with great haste, where there were indeed several people walking quickly away from the council chambers with nervous expressions who gave him distinct looks as they passed.

He knew Lorenz understood the weight of a noble’s duty; they have spoken of it often during their regular tea times at school together, before those conversations had changed to dancing around the subject of their shared feelings in the face of their duty to their households, and then to almost clandestine holding of hands and reading of poetry in which neither of them thought the least bit about long-winded discussions of noble politics.

He also knew Lorenz to be a fiercely protective man who saw Ferdinand as overburdened even beyond the expectations of a proper noble, and with little regard for Edelgard’s methods. Ferdinand could understand that to a degree, and in fact he had prided himself on questioning her at every time he saw fit, to ensure she fully understood the potential ramifications of her actions.

But he also saw a side of Edelgard, and of Hubert, that Lorenz never saw. Working so closely with the two of them (and with Professor Byleth, though her work was of a sort that Ferdinand knew little of and certainly did not envy), they had reached a sort of understanding that was difficult to describe. There was friendship, of course, and a mutual respect, and a desire to reach a particular goal, but even more than that…

Well, part of the reason he was so insistent was because Edelgard and Hubert worked so hard.

Part of it was that natural competitive urge and part of it was that concern, wanting to make sure they had an extra pair of shoulders to help them carry the burden, but another part of it was simply that he could not help but be inspired by their work ethic. To see them pouring everything into achieving their goals… It drove him in a way he would not have been able to put words to when he and Lorenz had first met.

His husband was a very smart man with a strong worth ethic, believing it was the duty of every noble to strengthen their people and uphold their family’s honour through their own diligence, but Ferdinand was not sure he had ever been truly motivated by a cause. Ferdinand himself was not sure _he_ had ever felt that, or if it was simply the almost infectious belief Edelgard held which had seeped into him over time.

Regardless, it meant that Lorenz did not quite understand why he was willing to work himself to exhaustion time and time again. And given that Lorenz could be quite an outspoken man when he wished, particularly since he had turned his back on his father’s expectations for him in order to share his life with Ferdinand— 

(something for which Ferdinand was so grateful, so incredibly blown away by every moment of every day that even while he was briskly walking to the council room in an internal panic to see what Lorenz’ well-contained polite wrath had wrought he was so thoroughly suffused with love for his husband that he had to take a moment to stop and compose himself)

— Ferdinand was certain that he would happily tell Edelgard _precisely_ what he thought of the situation, and truly, he could not imagine what the outcome of that would be, and the fact that he was almost certainly several hours late to whatever had happened only made him all the more nervous…

He rounded the final corner heading for the council room, where he knew Edelgard was likely to be at this time of day, and promptly ran right into Hubert.

That was quite literal, as well— Ferdinand practically bounced off of Hubert’s chest, and Hubert reached out to plant a firm hand on his shoulder to keep him from stumbling.

“Ah. I was wondering when you would show up.”

Ferdinand blinked, startled by their sudden collision, taking a moment too long to process that he was being spoken to and then another moment too long to process what Hubert was actually _saying_ to him.

“Hubert! My apologies for my tardiness—”

He could not even bother with explaining himself; he was far past that point, both in not wanting to make excuses and in being more concerned with other things than his own pride at the moment. Before he could ask what was foremost on his mind, before he could even _finish_ his _sentence_ , however—

“No need for explanation,” Hubert cut in, even though Ferdinand was not intending to explain any further, at least not until he knew what he needed to know. “Your _husband_ has already been doing a great deal of _explaining_ on your behalf. Though I do believe Lady Edelgard wishes to speak with you. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have business to attend to…”

“Hubert—!”

But whatever protest he might have had fell on deaf ears as Hubert swept past him, striding with purpose towards whatever important business he had, and there was always _something_ demanding his attention, so much so that he could hardly spare a moment for idle chatter that was anything but idle to Ferdinand—

He was stunned for a moment before he cleared his head and continued his hastened journey to the council room.

Hubert had not stated that she was waiting for him _there_ , but Ferdinand was certain that if she had been somewhere other than where Ferdinand was clearly already going, Hubert would have told him. And so he was not surprised to enter the council room and find Edelgard alone, seated at the head of the table, a great map of Fodlan spread across it with figures and pins in key locations, and a great number of papers and books in front of her— some letters with broken wax seals, some records that had been dug up from the palace archives, some massive tomes that must have contained the sort of dense records and histories that Ferdinand was more than familiar with but would not wish on his worst enemy.

He did not want to disturb her when she was so clearly _involved_ in her work, no matter the anxious state of his mind, and so he stood back near the door that he closed gently behind him and simply watched. She had her head all but buried in one of the massive dusty tomes, so old the leather binding was cracking with age and the pages had turned yellow, and every so often her eyes would flicker up to place another pin in the map or move one of the figures and then jot something own on a piece of paper that was filled edge to edge with a neat but cramped scrawl and splattered with ink spots where she had so hastily written something that she had sprayed ink across the page in her haste.

Of course, Edelgard was not the sort to be easily surprised, no matter how absorbed she was in her work; it took her only a few moments to notice him lingering in the doorway like a nervous child not wishing to bother their parents.

“Ah! Ferdinand.” She closed the book and set it aside, carefully avoiding setting it down on any of the delicate records or on the still wet ink of her notes. “I was just about to have Hubert send a messenger for you— those tax reforms you presented to me the other day. Do you have an updated draft of those after the meeting we had with Lord Hevring?”

“Ah— y-yes, in my office,” Ferdinand said, perhaps a bit startled by the immediate dive into work— but honestly, had he expected anything less from Edelgard, who had given herself hardly a moment to breathe since the war had closed out and who regularly had to be wrangled into sleeping so that she might present a strong front to her detractors? “I will fetch them at once, Edelgard. But first I must— apologize for my tardiness.”

“Hm? Oh. Thank you for the consideration, Ferdinand, but there’s no need for that.” Edelgard gave a small wave of the hand as if to brush off the apology that he had given not only out of a sense of propriety, but because he could not think of any other way to broach the subject without simply blurting out something he would surely regret later—

(Something along the lines of ‘please tell me you have not ordered my closest friend to execute my husband for treason’, or some such.)

“Lorenz explained the situation,” Edelgard added, making his heart _stop_ suddenly, and his breath stop at the same moment. “Really, Ferdinand, if you were in such dire condition, I wish you would have simply told me. Things are stable enough at the moment that we could certainly spare you for a few days to recover.”

“I—” Ferdinand started, then stopped when he realized he had _absolutely no idea what to say_. He cleared his throat and tried again with a, “E-Edelgard?” (Hating the way his voice broke up nervously…)

“Yes, Ferdinand?”

“If it is not an imposition— what _precisely_ did Lorenz say to you?”

“He told us that your health has been declining and that he was concerned you were overburdened,” she replied simply. “And I can’t help but be inclined to agree. Even Hubert commented just the other day that you were looking haggard.”

Just as the anxiety had begun to drain from him, it was immediately replaced with a flood of shame that brought a flush to his cheeks that he knew there was no hope of hiding. Certainly he pushed himself to do the most he possibly could— but aside from stumbling a bit on his way home, he happened to think he was holding up quite well. As well as one could be considering the circumstances, of course…

“That— maybe be a bit of an exaggeration,” he said with another clearing of his throat, this time to dispel the uncomfortable bubbling feeling he felt when he considered how hard Edelgard and Hubert were pushing themselves and yet _he_ was the one who was apparently falling noticeably behind. “I am grateful for the concern, of course, but I am quite well. Just a bit tired. Nothing a good night’s rest was not able to cure.”

“I’m glad to hear it, then,” Edelgard said, though he could tell by the look on her face that she was not completely convinced, which was fair enough because he had not seemed to be able to convince _anyone_ so far and in fact was not sure he even believed _himself_. “But it still troubles me that you didn’t think you could tell me about such a thing, Ferdinand. We all need rest at times.”

“With all due respect, Edelgard, I could hardly call myself a proper noble were I to stand idly by, _relaxing_ while you and Hubert work yourselves to the bone. I hardly intend to let the two of you do all the work while I do nothing.”

“Now that does sound more like you.”

When Edelgard chuckled, Ferdinand felt his face flush even further with shame, but he was determined to power through it. Specifically, he was determined to banish the last lingering threads of anxiety that had pulled him so quickly to the palace, or to at least have his last question answered—

“Did… Lorenz happen to say anything else?” he asked, trying to broach the subject casually, so that Edelgard would not see how anxious he felt asking such a question.

“He did, actually,” Edelgard said casually, as though she did not understand the way she just _casually_ dropped Ferdinand into an ice bath. “He offered to take up some of your duties here. Of course, there are certain things I can only trust to you, but I’m hardly in a position to turn away help from anyone I can trust, especially someone who knows his way around the politics of the Alliance like Lorenz does…”

Ferdinand blinked.

He… Had _not_ been expecting that.

“Ferdinand?”

“O-oh… Yes, Edelgard?” he asked, recovering from the fact that he had momentarily spaced out completely.

“If you happen to see the Professor while you’re getting that document from your office, could you tell her I need to speak with her?”

“Of course, Edelgard!” he said, and took that as a dismissal and an _excellent_ excuse to leave the room at as fast a pace as he could go without looking like a complete loon.

It was only after he had gone to his office, retrieved the documents Edelgard had requested of him, sent them back to her in the hands of the nearest messenger he could find, and found a servant who could tell him precisely where Lord Gloucester was that he was _finally_ able to catch up with Lorenz.

He found him in a common room that he had seemingly converted to a personal study, seated at a table and pouring over a mountainous pile of books, scribbling furiously but neatly in perfect curling script that Ferdinand would recognize even from across the room into a notebook that he had seemingly already half filled.

“You did not need to do all of this,” he said by way of greeting as he walked up behind Lorenz, slipping his arms around him from behind.

Lorenz had obviously noticed someone entering the room, but had not known it was him, because he startled at the embrace. As soon as he spoke he relaxed and leaned back into the touch, head resting comfortably against Ferdinand’s shoulder.

“I only did what I should have done _long_ ago,” Lorenz said, closing the current book and setting it aside on top of an already precarious but neatly stacked pile. “I complain about how much you overburden yourself and how much they overwork you, but I’ve never offered to help. In that way, I’m just as guilty as they are.”

“You help more than you could ever know,” Ferdinand said, something welling up in his chest when he heard Lorenz speak that way about himself. Frustration, partly— not at Lorenz but at himself for not making his husband feel appreciated enough. And alongside it, love, always overflowing for the perfect man who had tossed aside the tradition he held so dear without a second thought to be with him.

“Do I, now?” Lorenz asked, a teasing lilt to his voice as he tilted his head back, taking hold of Ferdinand’s cravat to pull him in for a kiss— chaste, befitting their public setting, but Ferdinand could feel the twitch of Lorenz’ lips against his own as he smiled just before releasing him. They maintained the same pose so they might look each other in the eye, though Ferdinand was certain it had to be placing a great strain on Lorenz’ neck… “Hm. You can tell me all about it at dinner, then. And a nice glass of wine, perhaps the one Claude sent us. Provided we get through our respective work quickly enough.”

Ferdinand looked up at the small mountain of books and sheaf of papers sitting in front of Lorenz. Goddess, did his workload really look like _that_? And Edelgard had explicitly said that she had only trusted him with some of his duties…

It was no wonder that Lorenz fretted over him, looking at it like this. Perhaps he really _had_ been overworking himself.

Oh, well. There was hardly anything to be done about that, not when _everyone_ was just as overworked. There was a great deal of cleanup to be done in the aftermath of a continent spanning war, after all— once the bulk of it was settled, then they would all have a chance to breathe.

He and Lorenz had gotten married— rather hastily, something which he could hardly say he _regretted_ (how could he ever regret marrying Lorenz), but which he wished they had time to plan properly rather than having to rush things. But the war had just finished, and given the tense political climate that naturally followed, it had both provided the perfect opportunity for them to wed while the naysayers and detractors were otherwise distracted, and the chance to be the first to make such a bold move in Edelgard’s new order, paving the way for future generations…

Ferdinand only wished he could have given him the elegant, elaborate wedding he deserved. They had been married in the Imperial Palace, a regal enough location to be certain, but they had had little time to put together a guest list or a reception, and it had just been those among their old friends who had been able to attend and the requisite people needed to perform the ceremony.

They had not even had time for a honeymoon; Ferdinand had far too much to do as the newly-appointed Prime Minister to consider such a thing.

He had already made up his mind about taking Lorenz away the moment he could afford the time; he was only further driven by the sight of his (pardon his blasphemy) _divine_ husband slogging through the absolute most _dreary_ trade agreements and historical tax records he could _imagine_ in order to lessen his own burdens.

“I suppose I had better get a move on, then,” Ferdinand said, brightly, feeling his body flooding with a newfound energy that he had not felt since the first days after the war, when they had all still been riding high on the adrenaline of a battle won and before the Black Eagle Strike Force had gone their separate ways. Oh, a sense of competitive energy had been driving him forward even though he had put aside his feud with Edelgard (although he liked to think that now that they were closer, there was nothing wrong with a bit of friendly competition, simply to keep each other on their toes), as well as the constant desire to be a part of something greater than himself… But such motivation could only carry you so far when most of your job involved incredibly boring paperwork and increasingly frustrating meetings with nobles who were a disgrace to the very concept of nobility, and made even _Ferdinand_ think that Edelgard had been quite right in her notion to discard with the whole idea in its entirety. Honestly, he had never heard of grown men being so… _Whiny_.

“You do have a bit of catching up to do,” Lorenz said, smiling at him coyly as he turned back to his mountainous stack of papers.

“And I suppose you have nothing to do with that after instructing everyone to allow me to sleep in, hm?”

Tea; that was what they needed, for motivation. And Ferdinand needed to fetch a few things from his office; it would certainly be easier to simply work there, but the idea of having Lorenz’ comforting presence nearby while he worked was far too pleasant a thought to pass up. Perhaps he could even convince Edelgard to give the two of them a larger shared office, if Lorenz were to be working alongside him for the foreseeable future…

“Ferdinand?”

“Hm?” He snapped out of his reverent train of thought perhaps a moment later than he should have.

“Are you feeling alright? You’re just sort of… staring into space.”

Lorenz was frowning at him, and Ferdinand could not help but smile and shake his head.

“Perfectly fine, my love,” he said, and could not help but admire the way Lorenz’ face was immediately dusted by a lovely pink, as though he had not heard himself called Ferdinand’s love every day since they had been schoolmates. “I am going to fetch us some refreshments, and then let us see about finishing up in time for dinner, shall we?”

And even if they did not, the prospect no longer seemed half as daunting knowing he would have his beloved husband by his side, helping him along the way. Lorenz was not waiting on the other side for him as his guiding light, though he had always found that to be beautiful in its own right; he was beside him, walking the path with him.

Even if that meant skipping meals, sleepless nights, terrible wrist cramps from signing one’s name too many times in a row, and frustration headaches from arguing at a roundtable for most of one’s afternoon.

Truly, Ferdinand could not imagine anything more romantic.


End file.
